People usually prefer to stay in a relationship even if they know that it is not working out because they are afraid to be alone or don’t want to deal with post break up emotional pain. But sometimes, you are better off alone than stuck in a bad relationship with a sad partner. Here’s a quick checklist to know if your relationship is really over.
Are You Annoyed By The Little Things?
When you are first in love with someone you fall in love with all their ticks and moves. You will love the way they breathe, the way they laugh and even the way they snore. But when you start falling out of love, things become different. You start to feel uncomfortable to be around them. You get annoyed by everything they do and you will make them aware of your feelings. You will hate their grammar, the way they drink and the way they sit on the couch. Over time this will create resentment and distance between you and your partner.
Does Your Partner Generalise Everything?
If your partner starts to use words like ‘always’ and ‘never’ in every argument then chances are they are very unsatisfied in the relationship. They start to criticise the whole relationship and not just one situation that would encourage you both to work it out. If you and your partner feel that you ‘always’ end up in the same arguments then it is a sign that it is not working out between both of you.
Have You Stopped Expressing Affection?
Some couples are not physical and won’t have sex for long periods but they would still express their affection through cuddling, walking together or having heart-to-heart talks. If you as a couple stopped doing that and started to spend more time away from each other then there is something definitely wrong with your relationship. If you are living together but not touching or saying nice things to each other, more like strangers under the same roof, then you should probably consider separation so that each one of you can get a chance at happiness with someone else.
Do You Feel That You Need To Hide Things?
Some people think that some things are better left unsaid. While this could be true in some situations, the truth is that if you always feel that you have to hide things or keep things then you are probably in the wrong relationship. If you also feel that your partner is not sharing everything with you and is keeping secrets, then maybe they don’t feel as safe in the relationship.
Is The Bad More Than The Good?
Relationships are living things. This means that they are born, they get nourished, grow up and they might get sick and die. If you feel that you are mostly dealing with anger episodes, problems, defensive attitudes and attacks with little or no good then this is a very clear sign that your relationship is dying. It is normal to have some negativity because life is not a romantic movie but if there is no good, if you are always feeding each other with negative feelings then you are probably better off away from each other.
Do You Prefer Spending Time Alone Or In Silence?
Do you feel more peaceful and relieved when you are having a dinner alone? Or do you have dinner together but sit in dreadful silence? If you feel that your relationship has been functioning on autopilot then it is a sign that your relationship is probably over. If you are not pals, if you don’t know how to make a conversation or discuss the events of your days then you should probably think seriously about the future of your relationship. People need to talk in order to share their feelings and thoughts. If you stopped talking, then you probably stopped feeling comfortable around each other a long time ago.
Have You Tried Everything?
If you have already tried everything and still find no progress then this is a sign that your relationship is over. Don’t hesitate to make an effort before you give up. Try to talk to your partner. Consider counselling. But if everything fails then maybe it is time to move on. You will both be better off without this relationship and you might find your happiness with someone else.
Look for the signs and pay attention. Sometimes an ending is nothing but a new beginning.